Huh, you want ME to do WHAT???

I was very comfortable warming the pews and bringing up my children - until a bus trip from Wellington to Hastings to see my sister. I was looking forward to seeing her and her family - and also reflecting on my son's graduation ceremony the night before.

The bus was going at a good pace, I was enjoying the scenery and the thought of a few days freedom from housework when out of nowhere, this really insistent thought kept coming that there were a whole lot of people out there that really needed to know about Jesus. I'd always known that - but somehow this time it really became personal - it hit me in a way that was life altering. In particular I kept looking out at the not so nice areas where people were living, and I sensed that God was placing a desire to work with these sorts of people and a compassion was forming for what they were going through.

I thought that immediately doors would be flung open, but that hasn't been so. Instead, I have had to do some sorting out in my own personal life, some surrendering of dreams I've had for how I wanted my life to develop, and to learn how to listen to people from all walks of life, trying to understand them and what is important to them, letting them tell their story rather than me impose my story on them. I'm glad I didn't rush in as I would've gone in with completely the wrong attitude, one which would've been arrogant and condescending and totally unhelpful.

Kingdom Builders 04 conference seemed to be a time of God calling me to be more deliberate and intentional about moving out.

I can still remember that feeling as I knocked on the door of the Community cottage to introduce myself. I was shaking and if I hadn't already spoken of my intentions to Steve (and by doing that making myself accountable) I reckon I would've chickened out.
I was blown away by the welcome I received that day.
Since then God has taken the little I had and grown it heaps.


I am humbled by the dedication and committment those people at the cottage have for their community. It is teaching me much about how to love and care for people.

Now it seems is the time that doors are starting to open. I am becoming more involved with the local community cottage and am applying to be a school chaplain.

In the past my mission field has been very narrow, and I left it up to everyone else to do the hard work using the excuse I didn't have the right spiritual gifts to evangelize - sadly the church wasn't a great help in this regard. There were meetings on how to witness (inferring that you could pass or fail!), lists of essential memory verses to learn so that you would "be equipped" and the
mission field was regarded as those out there.

And I am going to have to continue tomorrow as it is late and my brain has gone to sleep!